Still need to get a new hose, mine looks ridiculous with the electrical tape on it. I find that when I get close to a breakthrough I really look forward to going home and going to sleep. After a year I am still falling asleep at my desk. Its time to go on the hunt for some provigil.

Please feel free to sign up and comment or engage in conversation. I know plenty of people out there are going through the same things I am.

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Sleep apnea can cause serious problems if it isn’t treated. Your risk of heart disease and stroke is higher if serious sleep apnea goes untreated. Sleep apnea is more common in men. One out of 25 middle-aged men and 1 out of 50 middle-aged women have sleep apnea that causes them to be very sleepy during the day. Sleep apnea occurs in about 25 percent of men and nearly 10 percent of women. Sleep apnea can affect people of all ages, including babies and children and particularly people over the age of forty and those who are overweight.

Sleep apnea can also be characterized by choking sensations. The frequent interruptions of deep, restorative sleep often lead to early morning headaches and excessive daytime sleepiness. Sleep apnea doubles the risk for stroke. The worse the sleep apnea, the greater the risk; moderate-to-severe obstructive sleep apnea can triple the risk of stroke. Sleep apnea is a common disorder in which breathing stops during sleep for 10 seconds or more, sometimes more than 300 times a night. The hallmark of the disorder is excessive daytime sleepiness and compromised quality of life, including significant social and emotional problems.

Sleep apnea is more common in women after menopause than before. Sleep apnea means “cessation of breath.”.It is characterized by repetitive episodes of upper airway obstruction that occur during sleep, usually associated with a reduction in blood oxygen saturation. In other words, the airway becomes obstructed at several possible sites. Sleep Apnea is a progressive condition (gets worse as you age) and should not be taken lightly.

Sleep apnea is underdiagnosed. Studies indicate that 2%-4% of adult Americans have the disease and that obstructive sleep apnea syndrome (OSA) is as common as asthma. Sleep apnea may impair daytime vigilance, he added. Sleep apnea is a common problem that affects an estimated 2% of all children, including many who are undiagnosed. If not treated, sleep apnea can lead to a variety of problems.

Sleep apnea is a serious, potentially life threatening sleep disorder. It is as common as adult diabetes and affects more than 12 million Americans. Sleep apnea seems to run in some families, suggesting a possible genetic basis. Sleep apnea is a sleep disorder in which breathing stops in intervals that may last from 10 seconds to a minute or longer. During these sleep events, air exchange may be impaired, and blood oxygen levels drop and carbon dioxide levels rise.

Sleep apnea often results in feelings of fatigue and excessive daytime sleepiness , since the ability to reach deep, restorative sleep stages is impaired. Other warning signs of sleep apnea are often noticed by bed partners and include loud snoring and making snorting or choking sounds at night. Sleep apnea affects many people. It is a condition where a person stops breathing while sleeping. Sleep apnea is one of the most prevalent of the breathing disorders of sleep.

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Ever had one? If not, you’re blessed. Before I tell you what happened, let me give you the cut and paste mini definition of a night terror. This is the clinical version, for any of you that have any sort of faith in the metaphysical – you might have a slightly different idea as to the what and why of night terrors.

A night terror, also known as pavor nocturnus, is a parasomnia sleep disorder characterized by extreme terror and a temporary inability to regain full consciousness. The subject wakes abruptly from slow-wave sleep, with waking usually accompanied by gasping, moaning, or screaming. It is often impossible to fully awaken the person, and after the episode the subject normally settles back to sleep without waking. A night terror can rarely be recalled by the subject. They typically occur during non-rapid eye movement sleep.

I have been having a hard time lately. Sarah moving out, general depression, the IRS notified me that they were going to garnish my wages so essentially, Im pretty screwed. Needless to say I’ve got a lot going on. Anyway, I usually read before I go to sleep to quiet my mind. If things aren’t going well, sleep doesn’t come easy. It’s not un-common for me to hear things in my head. I know its in my head, but as I get closer to sleep sometimes they are a little creepy. Last night I heard a little girl say something along the lines of “Maybe its time to give up” or something like that. I don’t remember exactly but it was creepy and negative. Last week I had downloaded some hypnosis MP3’s from a bit torrent site. One of them is for success and motivation, the other is to enhance creativity. I imagine they are both supposed to contain some sort of hidden audio that is supposed to plant things in your subconscious. I had wondered about the safety of downloading bootlegs of these things. A motivated audio tech with malicious intent could put pretty much anything in there, but do I even think they even work? Who knows.

I grabbed my Ipod and some new headphones that Michael Koss had given me, put on my BiPap mask, then the headphones, I looked like a fighter pilot preparing for a battle. I put on the MP3 for creativity. I had listened to the other one before but it was so new age, with wind, bells, a waterfall. It was annoying, so I put on the one for creativity. Same deal but a little more tolerable. Now, when I am falling asleep its not uncommon for me to see a sort of movie type thing in my head. I don’t really see it, I can just sort of imagine it if that makes sense. For a creative person I am actually really bad at true visualization, if I close my eyes I just see black. I was about 25 minutes into this hypnosis MP3 when all of a sudden I started seeing these colorful vines start to materialize in front of me, they were animated, they didn’t look real but sort of reminded me of the animation from Pink Floyd’s movie The Wall. Very interesting, very unusual, it was reminiscent of the hallucinations from mushrooms or acid in my youth. That right there is a bad sign. Just as I was starting to see that they were getting brighter and more vivid, the mp3 ended. My curiosity was piqued – could I reproduce this? I restarted the MP3, a little louder this time. I was tired.

I started analyzing the music. It was strings, like a harp, with the sound of ocean waves behind it. I noticed that some notes had an accent and were much louder, I wondered if this was being used to plant the hypnotic suggestion. I thought I probably was over analyzing it and I was not going to get the same effect. Then I saw a bright flash, like a camera flash and I think I remember seeing a small figure of a man, glowing green. I dont really remember, but more colors and almost like there was a light in the room. Then the vines came, all colors, twisting and growing, getting bigger. I guess I fell asleep.

I dont know how long I was asleep, I think the mp3 is around 30 minutes long so it couldnt have been more than a few minutes. I woke up with it still playing, I could open my eyes a little, at least I think I could but I was paralyzed. I couldnt move, I could hear the music but now I could hear a voice. The voice was metallic sounding, almost robotic and maybe backwards or scrambled. It was evil, it was terrifying. I think I realized fairly quickly that I was having a night terror, but it didnt make it any less scary. I would imagine this only lasted a few seconds but it felt like 5 minutes and now I remember thinking, that is the voice that is encoded in the music, that’s the hypnotic suggestion, I am hearing what my subconscious was hearing and almost translating, my mind balancing between reality and whatever dimension we enter when we are asleep. This really didn’t calm me at all because the voice sounded truly nefarious.

I an not new to night terrors. I used to get them when I was a kid, usually it involved something to do with strangulation. I have major issues with my neck. I have also read that there are some common events in night terrors, many people hearing breaking glass, many people see large insects crawling on them, and many see someone else in the room with them. I have also heard that it is your unconscious trying to hit you with your absolute worst fear or phobia. No one can scare you more than you can scare yourself. I don’t understand why our brains would want to do this to us. Personally I feel crazy enough as it is. I experienced a group night terror from MDMA in 2002. Me, my girlfriend at the time, and best friend all had them on the same night. I am going to write about that experience very soon, it is hands down one of the most terrifying events of my life and I will never forget it. It is also why I mentioned the metaphysical at the top of this post.

I need more phobias and craziness in my life like I need a hole in the head, but in the name of science I think I need to try it again.

Sleep well.

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Called a dentist, I actually looked them up on city search and found they had some great reviews. I made an appointment. They agreed to see me that day. I came in covered in sweat, about to pass out. I stammered and stuttered and tried to tell them why I had such a phobia of dentists. I removed my own braces, etc. They put the kid gloves on. I have been back three times now. Still dont know about the crown or not. I have been in for a two part “deep cleaning” 12 shots of novacaine. When I filled out the paperwork I circled extreme 8 times when it came to the “how freaked out about dentists are you?” line.

I am never honest about the medication I am taking, I dont know why, Im just not. That may be my downfall at some point but I do try to keep track of it online to check for any adverse reactions. At any rate, the bill for the filling which was really more of a reconstruction of the tooth was only $38 after my insurance. The deep cleaning, well I dont know. I couldnt pay today so I deliberately forgot my check book. They said pay next time, because there will be a next time, and time after that, and time after that. This is going to cost a small fortune. I think they are breaking the bad news to me slowly, which is good and bad. Im paranoid by nature, and I HATE doctors. This dentist is actually fantastic and so are his “girls”, I dont call them that – they do.

As far as sleep apnea goes, nothing to report, actually its quite boring. I hacked the machine, lowered the pressure from an 18 to 14, now I get 0 AI’s most nights. I still feel like shit, and the machine has been clogging my ears so I stopped using it for a while. I think I have gone to collection for not paying the rest of the money I owe for the bipap. Oh well, its blood from a stone at this point.

If you’re in Milwaukee and you want a good dentist, call Dr. Zeeb on broadway. Tell them Ben the basket case sent you , maybe I’ll get a break on my bill.

I feel compelled to tell you that I don’t write this drivel because I think someone is interested. Im not that self absorbed. I am using this to test out some search engine stuff. If there is something here that is interesting to you, well then bonus – thats awesome. I placed an very similar post on my online confessions site to test some duplicate content theories.

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Anyway, I found it interesting. It’s also cool that he seems to interact with people on his blog. Thats rare. He is also giving away an isolation tank, which is something I have always wanted. I guess I shouldn’t mention that because it only dilutes my chances of winning. Oh well. Its probably fixed anyway.

I hope hes cool with me posting his pic. If not, let me know and I’ll take it down. Ill put a link to his blog in my list of links. That seems fair.

Here is the link to his blog

Oh yeah, he was also on News Radio. Man I loved that show.

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CHICAGO - Being deprived of sleep even for one night makes the brain unstable and prone to sudden shutdowns akin to a power failure — brief lapses that hover between sleep and wakefulness, researchers said on Tuesday.

“It’s as though it is both asleep and awake and they are switching between each other very rapidly,” said David Dinges of the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine, whose study appears in the Journal of Neuroscience. <whole story at MSNBC>

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